Gripped by God’s Grace (Part 2)

It’s been more than a month since my dear Dad was promoted to heaven, and I’d like to share another update about how I’m doing on my journey of healing. It’s never easy to lose a parent or loved one. I’d like to share a few more things that are helping me through. I hope something in this post encourages you as you process the loss of your loved one.

Right now, I’m trying to find a nice balance between feeling sad and feeling joy. Thankfully, I have more ups than down and more highs than lows. Here’s a few more things that have been helping:

Letting the tears flow I’ve never been a big fan of crying, but I’ve learned not to hold back my tears, especially when it comes to my Dad. God created us with different emotions, including sadness. It’s healthy and ok to cry. It’s healing and cathartic to release those tears. I don’t stay there though. I let the moment pass. And sometimes, they’re actually happy tears as I think of fond memories.

Here are a few thoughts and Bible verses related to sadness and tears:

• God is aware of our tears “Record my misery; list my tears on your scroll — are they not in your record?” (Psalm 56:8)
• God is right there with you “The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” (Psalm 34:18)
• God will bring you through “You turned my wailing into dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy, that my heart may sing your praises and not be silent. Lord my God, I will praise you forever.” (Psalm 30:11-12)

My Dad was a go-getter and loved life and really lived to the fullest. It helps me to remember that he wouldn’t want me to be miserable and crying all the time. He loved seeing me happy and smiling and laughing. And so, I aim to remember him with joy. And finding joy in this journey and reasons to smile, even while missing him, is a way I can honor my Dad’s zest for life.

Finding the balance between missing my Dad and enjoying mi familia Along the same lines, I can miss my Dad, but I also need to rejoice and celebrate mi familia still here. God has blessed us with this life. He has kept us here for a purpose. I need to be present and live in today. The following Bible verses remind me that tomorrow isn’t promised and that every day is a gift from God:

• “Do not boast about tomorrow, for you do not know what a day may bring.” (Proverbs 27:1)
• “Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.” (Psalm 90:12)
• “The LORD has done it this very day; let us rejoice today and be glad.” (Psalm 118:24)

Finding the balance between keeping traditions and starting new ones We just had our first major holiday without my Dad. My dear Dad had his first Easter in heaven with Jesus. Glory! Mi familia has some birthdays and a major graduation coming up. We can either wallow in sorrow and pity and mourn that my Dad isn’t here with us on earth or we can keep some of our favorite family traditions and take time to try new traditions. It’s nice to know we can make new memories while still honoring my Dad.

Talking to extended family We recently had a Zoom with a few family members and it was such a blessing to share some of our favorite memories and stories about my Dad. It’s great to hear everyone’s different perspectives and to see my Dad through their eyes.

Learning more about my Dad’s culture My Dad loved the United States, but he also loved his home country of Ecuador. I’m being intentional about tapping into my Ecuadorian roots a bit. Some of the ways I’ve done so are by eating ceviche (shrimp cocktail), which was one of our favorite dishes to eat together. I’ve also been listening to Andean music, which my Dad really enjoyed. I’m enjoying wearing some of the beautiful ponchos (shawls) and jewelry my Dad has given me over the years and using the mochilas (backpacks) he’s gifted me. These items have so much more meaning and sentimental value for me now. They help me connect to a culture and heritage my Dad was very proud of.

Learning more about heaven I’m eternally grateful that I got to witness my Dad receive Jesus as His Lord and Savior a few years ago. Now that my Dad is in heaven, I’m more curious and interested in what’s going on up there. I know it’s a million times better than anything we could ever think or imagine.

Here’s just a taste of what the Bible says about heaven:

There’s continuous prayer and worship going on

“Each of the four living creatures had six wings and was covered with eyes all around, even under its wings. Day and night they never stop saying:

‘Holy, holy, holy

is the Lord God Almighty,’

who was, and is, and is to come.’

Whenever the living creatures give glory, honor and thanks to him who sits on the throne and who lives for ever and ever, the twenty-four elders fall down before him who sits on the throne and worship him who lives for ever and ever. They lay their crowns before the throne and say:

‘You are worthy, our Lord and God,

to receive glory and honor and power,

for you created all things,

and by your will they were created

and have their being.’” (Revelation 4:8-11)

Our prayers are rising like incense

“And when he had taken it, the four living creatures and the twenty-four elders fell down before the Lamb. Each one had a harp and they were holding golden bowls full of incense, which are the prayers of God’s people.” (Revelation 5:8)

The angels are rejoicing

“I tell you that in the same way there will be more rejoicing in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who do not need to repent.” (Luke 15:7)

Jesus is interceding for us

“Christ Jesus who died–more than that, who was raised to life–is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us.” (Romans 8:34b)

Jesus is preparing a place for us

“My Father’s house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. You know the way to the place where I am going.” (John 14:2-4)

There won’t be anymore crying

“He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death’ or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” (Revelation 21:4)

What a glorious day it will be when we’re reunited with our loved ones already in heaven with our Heavenly Father. Until then, let’s live God’s will for our lives while we’re here. Let’s embrace and cherish the precious memories of our loved ones who have gone before us, and let’s enjoy and celebrate the loved ones we still have with us.

If you’re struggling to cope with the loss of a loved one, please reach out to a Christian counselor for extra support or check if your church has a bereavement group.

And if you’re wondering the way to heaven, here’s what Jesus said:

“Jesus answered, ‘I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.'” (John 14:6)

And here’s what the Bible also says:

“If you declare with your mouth, ‘Jesus is Lord,’ and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you profess your faith and are saved.” (Romans 10:9-10)

If you’d like to share what’s helped you through your journey of losing a parent or other loved one, please feel free to comment below or on Abounding Faith’s Facebook page.

If you’d like to read more about my Dad, you can read about some of our adventures in By Faith: Adventures and Reflections on Walking With God Here and Abroad.

You can also check out these blog posts I’ve written over the years:

• Gripped by God’s Grace (Part 1)
• That’s My Dad – A Tribute
• Lesson Learned from My Dad
• Over the Moon: My Connection to Apollo 11
• Let Your Light Shine
• Lost and Found

(FYI, I took the sky pic on Resurrection Sunday.)

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